woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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