oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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