I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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