god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
