i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
