so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
