What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
