I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I FOUND THE LEGS
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
