did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
