belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Randomize
