awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
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