sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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