Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
how can u be prego again
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
