If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I came so hard my ears popped.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
