Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
