Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
