its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
The adults are the big ones right?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
