Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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