marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
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they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
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FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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