that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
