I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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