i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Randomize
