After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
