if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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