It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
