margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize