is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
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