are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
