Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
one might say we're banned from that church
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
