Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Randomize
