bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Randomize
