he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
