I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
