We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Randomize
