I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Sponge bath it is.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
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I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
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Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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