Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize
