I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Someone shattered a urinal.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
