walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
