Can i not drive my cunt home
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory