quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
