Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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