Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
i now understand why vodka
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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