At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
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