i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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