Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize