Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Randomize