Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize
