You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
nutella sex= disaster
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
