this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
ugly people sure do ruin things
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
