Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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